Aaron Ketner
As the designated stompboarder to Dabe and his good buds, I feel it is my duty to
keep all you ska-ers updated on the Stomp-World. Since Dabeand His Good Buds
is the lifeforce as the Manifesto proves, I will also use the lifeforce to reach out to
the Omniverse and spread Thrashpunx joyism.
First thing’s first, the Thrashpunx Legends. It is important that the world knows
the Thrashpunx Legends, because just like Dabe and His Good Buds, it might
save your life one day. I believe myself to be the All-seeing Historian of
Thrashpunx. See, I get these images in my head, these ideas that I believe to
be Stompboard history, so I right them down and tell them to you, and we
Thrashpunx believe them to be true….. similar to Scientology, minus the fees
and Tom Cruise.
Thrashpunx Legend I
It all began billions of years ago, 7 to be exact. Before earth even existed,
there were two great powers in the galazy, the Thrashpunx Gods and the
Universal Mouse Clan (aka UMC). Both of these clans believed themselves to
be the greatest clan in the world. On a sunny friday evening, these two clans
collided together, by extreme accident. But, both being the peaceful, fun-loving
clans that they were, they did not battle to the death to determin who was
greater; they agreed to share the title, both equally being as great as the
other. During this agreement, they made a vow, a vow that they would never
break this agreement, that they would never fight; a peace offering if you will.
Along with this vow, they swore to protect each other to the death. Each clan
would send their most elite defenders to protect the heirs to each others
throne. This vow still holds strong today, as it is everlasting. As the All-seeing
Historian to Thrashpunx, I have been trying to track down the heirs to the
Thrashpunx Gods, and I think these mice are the greatest clue. These mice are
elusive, trying not to be discovered by the heirs they watch, it is safest this way.
But every once in a while, they slip up, and the heirs become aware of their
existence, this is what I call the Awakening. So fellow humans, if you discover a
mouse, or mice if you are lucky, creeping around your house, feel honored, for
you must be one of the descendents to the Thrashpunx Gods. Do not kill these
mice, they are there for your own benefit. But please, if you become Awakened,
inform me, I may be able to help you.
